Snobbery, backstabbing and betrayal – the world of horses

It has always amazed me that in the horse riding community, a world which is fulled with a mutual love for an absolutely incredible animal, there is always so much going on behind the scenes.

The picture I chose to include with this post portrays a statue of a horse, one of only a few made where the RIDER is actually serving the horse. I haven’t been riding for very long and I won’t pretend to be an expert in the matter, but horses genuinely are the most amazing creatures. They pretty much will do whatever you ask, if you ask in a manner they can understand. I suppose that is the trick – learning their language.

Humans, on the other hand, and for some reason, humans who love horses, are the most snobbish and jealous bunch I have ever had the displeasure of encountering. While you do get a handful that are genuinely pleased and proud of the achievements and accomplishments of others, at most horse shows you go to there is a distinct undercurrent of all sorts of jealousy and betrayal.

But that is most certainly enough complaining because despite all of this, in the end, the only thing that matters is your relationship with your horse. And THAT is what makes all the rest worthwhile. It took me a few horses and a few years before I understood this. I luckily came upon a “horse of a lifetime”, an absolute dream horse and such a pleasure to ride, and have fallen absolutely head over heels in love with him. Over the few years I had been riding I rode many different horses, some loaned just for a lesson or two, some purchased, but I never fell in love or felt that my horse was mine for keeps. They were always just “things” that could be sold, replaced. Now just thinking of selling my horse (something I might one day be forced to do) brings tears to my eyes. He is my boy, my child, my pride and my joy. When I am feeling down, a ride on him and I am flying. What an amazing feeling. It’s a feeling I want my children to experience too.

So yes, while it is true that a horse will do anything you ask of it, it is equally true that we, as riders of these magnificent animals, will also jump through hoops of fire for the privilege of owning one of these magnificent creatures. And perhaps, just perhaps, the reason for all the snobbery in the riding community is because of this love for our special creature – as surely no one else’s horse can possibly be as good as our beloved.

“According to you” … and a hilarious rendition of my first cycle in 20 years

I must admit to having recently been pondering the possible interpretations of the song by Orianthi “According to you”.

 

At first glance it seems to be the typical break up slash new boyfriend type song. But then you apply your mind to the lyrics a little bit and dig a little bit deeper and start getting some really rather awkward questions arising. Like should this really be what our teenagers listen to??
If I apply that song to my situation, I could easily say that my husband is the “you” in the song. As I have mentioned in previous blogs it really seems to me that he hates me. Despises, even. And that is pretty much what the song is saying, from what I understand. It’s saying that the person you are with seems to dislike you, but the new guy on the block, well according to him the sun shines out of your bum!! Look, if you are still worried about the “you” – why is there a “him”? Is the song about affairs necessarily? I’m not sure. But it seems to be. Also I think it says a lot about the person “singing” it – at first I thought, yes, I can relate to that. My husband thinks I’m horrid. Then I started thinking about past boyfriends. And past friends. And I started to think that in the beginning of the relationship my husband though I was awesome too. So perhaps the whole song, instead of about being about what YOU think and what HE thinks, is actually about the common denominator. ME. Perhaps I am the problem. Perhaps, in the beginning of a relationship it is easy to fool someone into thinking you are basically a nice person. Perhaps after a while they see through all that. So perhaps they do think you are stupid on occasion but they are still with you because they love you despite it. The new guy on the block? Well, maybe he will learn to love you. But once he has seen you, warts and all, the way the “you” in the song has seen you, he may not. So when the song asks “Everything is opposite, I don’t feel like stopping it, baby tell me what I got to loose?” I think the answer there is true love. Which is somebody who actually loves you DESPITE knowing all your weaknesses.

In other news ….

I decided this morning that today would be the day that I went for a bicycle ride. Now my husband has an old mountain bike tucked away in the garage. So I duly took it out the garage, sprayed it down with the hose pipe to get rid of all the spider webs, (shame, those poor spiders are now going to have to find new homes!!) sprayed it with an entire tin of Q20 so it wouldn’t rust after being sprayed with a hose pipe (yes, I am displaying my ignorance here!!), attempted to switch on my husbands air pump compressor thingy, couldn’t find the on button, aborted attempt in favour of a hand pump and duly pumped the tyres, after first spending a good deal of time doing it completely incorrectly. Nevertheless, I then thought I was ready to get on, only to discover that my husband, whose legs are a great deal shorter than mine, for some reason had set the seat to its highest possible setting. So high in fact that I could not reach the pedals. So I battled and I looked and I fiddled and I couldn’t figure out no matter how hard I tried how to lower the seat. I then proceeded to phone my husband to ask him, but got shouted at for daring to phone him (do I ever learn??). So I texted a friend who said I should google it and it turned out to be a little lever – so easily sorted and off I went on my first cycle in probably 20 years.

I have now come to the following conclusions regarding cycling:
1- It’s a darn side easier than jogging – in fact, its probably something I could do relatively easily, given a bit of practice and training;
2- It’s best to have mountain bike tyres because even with the most considerate of vehicles you sometimes end up off the road;
3- If you put the seat up and put your full weight on it and it falls down, only for you to do the same again, and again, and again, you have done something wrong. Figure it out.
4- My neck and shoulders get sore – but if I lower the seat my legs get all crampy. I’m going to attempt to raise the handle bars for the next time …. see what happens.
5- The water bottle tied to the bicycle is there for a reason. Use it. Fill it with liquid. After 15 minutes I was wishing I had, despite my tendency of getting cramps if I consume liquids during exercise.
6- Start with the uphills if possible. I started downhill and had to ride uphill back home – eish!!
7- Gears are a mystery. Anyone with any advice for a beginner – your comments will be most welcome. I put my bicycle on its middle gear and left it their for the duration of the cycle.
8- 5 minutes per kilometre average speed … probably really slow for anyone who cycles regularly but it’s a start.

Living and holidaying in paradise

I must admit to having had quite a holiday season.  Certainly no time for blogging, amid all activities and family commitments.  Lack of schools for the kids during holiday time cut a large chunk out of any mothers day … 

Most parents use this opportunity to take their children away and go on family vacation … already living in a vacation spot we 

generally stay put, give frustrated glances to all those “other” people who dare set foot in “our” little part of the world, and carry on with our daily lives as best we can, given the hard circumstances of crowds of people. 

So, you see, its very understandable that I haven’t, as yet, written a blog this year … been way to busy on the beach with the kids and trying not to trip over all the other people there! 

I have not “done” new year resolutions for years.  Probably because I grew up and realised that they do not actually work for more.  But in a similar light I was reflecting recently on what my goals for this year should be.  I was thinking that there is a whole list of things that I really “should” do …. and I’m not talking about a bucket list, but rather self improvement goals.  

I “should” , for example, spend more time with the children on the beach – even when they go back to school.  This paradise we live in is even better when the crowds depart – why is it I stay indoors and not enjoy it to its full? 

I “should” also be a better friend, wife, mother and daughter.  Are any of those easy things to achieve? No.  Are they worth it in the long run – hell yes!! I am coming to believe more and more that relationships are most successful when you have two whole people involved – when one is broken, no matter how hard you try, there will always be issues.  So my goal is to make myself whole.  I can’t fix you, but I can fix myself.  And if you are broken and that breaks me, then part of fixing myself will be letting you go.

I really, really “should” be a little less lazy when it comes to my job.  I need more motivation.  Filing is a horribly boring thing to do, but it is something that needs doing.  The pages aren’t going to file themselves.  I know this because, many a time, I have sat here, busily procrastinating on my facebook page, while watching my filing out the corner of my eye, and no matter how hard I wish, by the time my procrastination is complete the filing is still sitting there, laughing at me.  I have found that it is hard to start a task, but once busy with it, it is enjoyable – EVEN FILING!! It is accomplishing something.  It is ticking something off the proverbial list.  It lends a sense of achievement and accomplishment to the day.  

I “should” continue with my reading of the Bible – but I really “should” do it every day.  In the past 30 days I have managed 7.  Not exactly ideal.  The problem of course comes in because it’s not something I can do with my husband around.  And he is around a great deal of the time. 

Ah – you guessed one!! Yes, I really “should” blog more.  I enjoy sharing my thoughts with others.  I enjoy getting to know people.  I enjoy letting other people get to know me.  And blogging seems to accomplish that.  

I probably “should” cut back on my hobby (horse riding).  It is a little all consuming at the moment and leads to a great deal of guilt and anguish, given that my husband wants to shoot the horses all the time.  The problem with that is that I really enjoy it.  Also I find it is my sanity.  The feeling of being on a horses back and accomplishing in a sport in which you only entered 4 years ago …. it’s honestly priceless.  Whether it is worth the constant fights to pursue, I am as yet undecided.

Basically, if I look forward at 2014, and all that could be accomplished, together with all that “should” be accomplished, I think there is real opportunity for loads of love, loads of happiness, new friends, old friends and family.  

After all, what else is life about?